Lorrie

About Me

Well here goes...
-I am an interceding, prayer warrior, Christian BBW (although I'm working on not being as big of a BBW) that loves to laugh (Proverbs 17:22), who has never been married and has no children (unless you count my geriatric cat).
-I am NOT looking for hook-ups. There will be no sex until AFTER there's a band on my hand & vows said before God, friends/family...i.e. AFTER married. This is a NON-NEGOTIABLE for me. If you see this as a personal challenge to see if you can change my mind, forget it and move on. I take vows VERY seriously...not just ones made to other people or to God, but to myself as well.
-I've got a rather quick wit. I can give as good as I get...or maybe even better. 😉 I have been told by many different people that if I ever decided to do stand-up comedy, they'd gladly pay to come see me. My response: Stand-up comedy is too hard so I do sit-down comedy instead. lol Friends & family tell me that my sense of humor is not only funny, but also makes you think as well. I do clean jokes...like dad jokes, even though I'm obviously NOT a dad.
-I'm somewhere between a Proverbs 31 woman & Madea. (I tend to lean more towards being a Proverbs 31 woman, but if someone messes with someone that I love, my inner Madea or Scots-Irish side WILL come out).
-I'm fiercely loyal & faithful to those that I love.
-I'm a high school graduate, but life has taught me more than any school or university ever could. I'll never cut someone down for ignorance. Stupidity may get talked about, but ignorance, no. There IS a HUGE difference between the two. I value intelligence, but it is not as important to me as wisdom is.
-I'm told that I have a big, generous heart of gold (do they have x-ray vision superpowers? have I been touched by Midas without my knowledge? can I pawn it for money...LOL. j/k My heart is not worth any amount of money...aka it cannot be bought), and that I'm always putting others first even when/if I'm dealing with/going through my own situations (and we all have those). 😉
-An interesting thing about me, or so I'm told, is that my eyes change color with my moods. You'll just have to get to know me to find out what the various color changes are indicative of what mood I'm in.
-My username is because I was told a long time ago that my eyes always had a hint in them that I was/am on the verge of giggling and/or mischief, whether the rest of my face showed it or not.
-I am sometimes prone to shenanigans (orneriness), but no drama. The shenanigans are mainly to make people laugh. I will NEVER make fun of someone in a degrading way. I may tease, but I will NEVER put someone down.
-Speaking of moods...I'm generally a calm person, especially in a crisis. I'm extremely slow to anger, but when I get there...my Scots-Irish side or my inner Madea will make an appearance, but I am not a violent person.
-While I may be a calm person, I am rather chatty sometimes, but not all of the time.
-I was grew up on a farm which instilled a huge love for animals of all sorts, whether furry, wooly, hairy, feathered, or even scaly. Not a fan of slimy though, but can handle it. I can/will even bait my own hook when going fishing. (If I catch 'em you get to clean 'em...😉😁) I don't hunt, but do like to go fishing.
-I currently have a geriatric cat (born 01/01/2002) that I love immensely, but also love dogs too. I used to have 2 mastiff mixes before they passed away. (I've included a pic of them so you can see their size).I miss them terribly & wouldn't mind having Mastiffs or even Daniffs again in the future. So, as you can see, I'm okay with both cats and dogs. I also love most farm critters too, but mainly horses though. The only "critters" that I am really not a fan of would be mosquitoes. (I REALLY wish Noah would have swatted the 2 of them on the ark). 😁 I'm not afraid of most animals, but do have a healthy respect for those that would see me as an all-you-can-eat buffet. Most animals can smell/sense fear. I don't plan on being their next meal.
-I love the outdoors. Not really into hiking, due to physical limitations, but being out in creation (nature) is soul & mind settling. I do like watching God's creation (nature). Sometimes it's for inspiration to draw or paint, but mostly it's to marvel at and thank God for blessing me with another day.
-To be forthright, I am on full disability, but I am able to walk short distances. My mind & heart are willing, but my body says, "Nope...not gonna do it," (If you read that in a Ross Perot voice..kudos. Bonus kudos if you knew who Ross Perot was without pulling a google on him) after a little bit of a distance.
-I am a cancer survivor, and because of that, I am not able to bear children, but I do love children.
-Hobbies: art (looking at, drawing and/or painting), calligraphy, writing (working on a novel currently).
-I am not a smoker or drinker & would prefer not to kiss an ashtray. 😉
-I love watching football (American)...GO CHIEFS!!!!! and baseball...Go ROYALS!!!! (my cat is actually named after one of the Royals)!!!! I am okay with watching most sports (usually on tv) including golf...(more bonus kudos pts if you know what the name "golf" originally stood for), but I'm not really into watching the collegiate sports, not sure why. I've even been known to watch bass fishing tournaments on tv
-The type of tv shows/movies I like are: nature documentaries, motorsports, cooking shows, fantasy, romantic comedies, historical/period shows (like Downton Abbey), and rodeos. I also like true crime and/or detective shows like Sherlock Holmes, Nightwatch, Forensic Files, Joe Kenda: Homicide Hunter...just to name a few. I do like the sappy chick flicks & the Christmas romance movies too (Hallmark & Great American Family channel stuff)...after all...I AM a chick. I also like watching classic movies & westerns. So pretty much a wide variety. Not really into the reality shows, which aren't really reality anyway, or horror stuff with gratuitous violence (the plots are almost always predictable anyway).
-Movies: I am a fan of action, comedy, the Marvel/DC comic movies (Avengers, Batman, X-Men, Superman, Thor, Aquaman {love me some Mr. Mamoa-insert dreamy sigh here}, Ironman, etc.) Binged on Pennyworth: The Origins of Batman's Butler. I liked The Witcher, but was disappointed to see what they did with the Origins version of it. I'm a big fan of historical/period romantic movies. Not into horror flicks. I don't understand why someone would willingly pay to get their wits scared out of them. That's just crazy to me. There's enough stuff in life to scare you without seeing the gratuitous violence in the horror flicks. Smh.
-Used to ride horses all the time when I was still on the farm. I don't get to do so anymore and I miss it.
-I like to read, but haven't done a lot of that lately (except for my bible or a cookbook). I have to be in the mood for reading other books. As for the type of books I like to read, I like detective/mysteries (think John Grisham/Sherlock Holmes, etc.), romance (period/historical or modern), Christian fantasy (C.S. Lewis type) and fantasy.
-Current goals are:
-growing my hair longer. (It's at the top of my booty for now. I have had 2 traumatic hair cutting stories in my life, so that's the reason for this goal). Look out Crystal Gayle here I come! (More kudos pts if you know who she is & what famous person she's related to without pulling a google on her too).
-I am also working on losing weight.
-teaching my cat more tricks. (He's super smart).
-working on writing my own novel (other than here, obviously). It's in the same style as C.S. Lewis' The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe...aka Christian fantasy.

Thanks for reading my mini-novel & checking my profile out. Feel free to drop me a line if you think I'm a catch for you. If I'm not a match for you, may God bless your search so that you find the one He has for you.

About My Match

-I am looking for my Boaz/Solomon.
-He MUST be a dynamic Christian who is willing & able to be the physical & spiritual leader of the home. This is a non-negotiable for me.
-He MUST be okay with being 2nd in my life because God is & always will be 1st. (Being a non-Christian is a deal breaker for me. I will NOT be unequally yoked. If you are not a Christian, please move right on along).
-If you are only "separated," please move along. Separated is NOT single & I refuse to be "the other woman." This, too, is a NON-NEGOTIABLE.
-He must be okay with being with a disabled BBW in public & in private.
-He is secure enough in his manhood that he is okay with showing emotion/vulnerability to me from time to time. Men who don't show their emotions (other than only happiness or anger) are a turn off to me. They tend to "power up" on people. However, I'm also not looking for someone who is overly sensitive all of the time. It's a delicate balance.
-I tend to look at the heart of someone more than their looks. However, with that being said, I DO prefer men with dark hair, light colored eyes, and a big guy (think NFL linebacker, steer wrestler, lumberjack, etc. size). You get the idea. Since I am somewhat tall, I prefer my fella to be taller than me. I don't want to have to pick him up or get a crate for him to stand on just to have a smooch. 😉 😁.
-A sense of humor is a must. No raunchy stuff.
-I also prefer a man that doesn't drink, curse or smoke.
-I'm okay with an initial long distance relationship, but would prefer someone close.
-If you have an accent, you've already got a leg up on the competition.
-If you're handy around the house or in the garage (or both), that's a plus too, but it's not a deal breaker either.
-He MUST love animals since I usually have one. It's a rare time when I don't own one. I'm not one that has to take it everywhere with me though...there's a limit. Besides, he (my current cat) doesn't travel well.